Child Loss, Depression, Life, Random

The travails of lockdowns

I know it is necessary here, with how the Covid cases rising everyday and deaths too, but I’d forgotten how inconvenient a full lockdown was. One good thing is banks don’t have to work every day. Three days a week with 50% staff and timings up to 2, so I had to go only one day this week with Work from Home the other two days.

Writing hasn’t been going well, largely due to the deaths happening in our organisation. Many people I know personally died, and I have so much fear for my friends and family.

SPFBO 7 opens today, and I’m submitting Deathless Ones and keeping all my fingers crossed. I haven’t got around to reading much after I finished the Grishaverse, but I might start something next week or so.

I had dreams about my son on most days, and most of the days I wake up wishing I hadn’t. Anti depressants can only do so much, and several nights I had lain awake wishing I were dead. Some days are harder than others and I know I just need to hang in there on those days, but it is so difficult.

I plan to get my writing back on track by this week. Keeping my fingers crossed.

Nanowrimo, Random, SPFBO, WIP, Writing

Of Nanowrimo and other things

Unlike in previous years, I had a project all lined up for Nanowrimo this year. I had decided on it as early as July. I was finally going to start writing the second book of my Jaya! series, which is a retelling of the Hindu epic of Mahabharata with a twist. I was encouraged to do this by the response received for Prdayutita, the first book of the series in SPFBO 2020 where it was selected as one of the semi finalists.

I hadn’t read the Mahabharata in forever, and despite my love of the epic, and for Karna who is the central character of most of my mythology based books including Jaya!, I haven’t been feeling the same enthusiasm for the epic as I once did. Yet, I was excited to write it. The first draft of Prajwalita was going to be churned out during nano, and I started off well, writing the first 1k words in less than an hour.

And then I hit a snag, or rather my brain did. I am so used to working on multiple projects by now, that it seems my brain can’t really focus on one project alone. So, now I have Prajwalita, another WIP about aliens and magic that I started on Nov 1st, my vampire werewolf WIP as well as Clouds from the Past, a paranormal fantasy.

Let’s not forget that I also thought I should get around to doing the first edits of Flame of the Dragon’s Oath as well as Set in Stone, and they are both looking way better than I thought at the time of finishing them. The writing is good and engaging, and there are a few plot and world building issues that I’m fixing as I edit.

I have also been obsessively following news on the US elections. For a non American who lives in India, I have really been way too invested in those results, but I have friends over there whose well being and very lives depend on these results and I desperately need to find a reason to have faith in humanity.

I lost most of it today after the latest Supernatural episode, of course. I really want to yell at the showrunners, but anxiety brain is far too depressed for the effort.

I’m still on top of my nano goals and have crossed 15k words in five days. I’m planning to get to 20k this weekend.

Supernatural better do something before I start writing fanfictions, though.

Here’s the cool badge I got for Pradyutita which can be puchased here